Sunday, July 6, 2008

J. Geils Band had it right

How do I say this without sounding too abrasive? Well to begin with, let's preface this by saying that every single guy I've been involved with over the past, oh, I'd say about 12 months?, has been completely fucking psychotic. That being said, clearly I am in no way, shape, or form looking for a relationship. So why, I ask, is it so fucking hard to find someone who's normal (i.e. NOT crazy) and wants to spend some time watching "Freaks and Geeks", maybe smoking, perhaps making out and be totally unofficial but on a semi-constant basis? I'm not talking text messaging every day, I'm not talking changed status on ~*MySpAcE*~ ... I'm talking about straight up HANGING OUT, not being sketchy, and perhaps bringing it back to '01 and dry humping on your couch.

I'm a levelheaded person. I know when to say when. I know that calling a guy 3 times in a row is a no-no. I know that pet names are obnoxious on the verge of nauseating. I know I deserve more than being a glorified booty call, but Christ. The pickin's are slim so, yes, sometimes we have to make a few altercations to our usual high set standards. But what I'd like to know is when guys in New York City turned into such fucking pussies. Either you're shitting your pants that we didn't answer 1 of your 107 text messages or you're freaking out because you think that we're going to get the wrong idea about a situation, and in turn, end up freaking out yourself. Nobody's talking about marriage here ... and until there is an official "TALK", no assumptions are made. Man up for fucks sake. Either you're on the bus or you're off the bus.

It's summer and we're all just trying to get our kicks, KNOWWHATI'MSAYIN'?